Walking Away

There is a sad lesson to be learned while you grow older- growing apart. We grow apart from our toys, childhood dreams, and friends. While it is helpful and necessary for our personal growth it can often be an enormous emotional strain.
When my family moved to Maine I was fifteen with unruly curls and no fashion sense. I was a freshman in high school and I didn't know a soul in the whole state. The first day of school I had a math class where I met a ridiculously short, freckled redhead with the most perfect nose and infectious laughter. Her name was Caitlin and we soon became best friends. That first day of school was her birthday and for the past seven years we have always referred to it as our "anniversary". We have been close no matter the physical difference of our locations and come back together like two pieces of a whole.
I recently moved back to Maine from Asheville, North Carolina. We talked constantly while I was away and we ecstatic over our reunion. I arrived home around midnight to a lovely receiving party of my mother and all of the dogs. The next morning, not twelve hours later I was awoken by Caitlin bringing me a coolata and loads of gossip. It was wonderful but with a slight sour tint. Something had changed.
My best friend from the past seven years was no longer who I needed. A part of me would love to say that she was the one who did all of the changing but that would be a lie. She was who she always would be, fun, wild, and intensely high spirited. I cannot tell you how I myself have changed. I feel the exact same way but our old drives, long chats, and favorite activities hold no desire for me. When I am around her she makes me feel old. Like and elderly aunt or cousin who kindly puts up with your nonsense, patiently waiting for you to grow out of it.
Maybe this is growing up. Maybe this is me walking away, towards my new life. Maybe is all I can say, for tomorrow is a new day and no one can claim it. But it is difficult  to walk away from those glorious teen years, filled with frivolous nonsense that creates the ground you walk on, holds you like gravity to the planet. Growing up is a challenge but walking from someone you love is heartbreaking.